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Grammy winner, Doechii opened up about her struggles with suicide after getting bullied and how she overcame it after gracing the cover of the Cut magazine. “I was getting bullied so bad that I was thinking about killing myself. I realized, oh, fuck, I’m gonna kill myself and I’m gonna be the only one dead,” she said.
“The bullies aren’t gonna be with me and everything they said is not coming with me either. I would just be gone,” the rapper said, grinning. She reveals that after she declared she was not going to harm herself, she felt a wash of peace come over her. “ I made a choice, a decision. I am the most important character in this movie. This is my motherfucking movie.”
Also, during her interview with Cut magazine, Doechii emphasized the importance of authenticity in music, citing Lauryn Hill as her inspiration. “The feeling that I have when I listen to The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill is the same feeling I want some other Black little girl to have when she listens to me,” said Doechii. “And in order for her to have that feeling, I have to talk about my feelings.”
Doechii’s reflection about suicide and bullying comes after singer SZA revealed her struggles as a child. “I was bullied because I wasn’t quiet and I was awkward at the same time. I wasn’t this tiny sad victim, but I was more so attacked just because it was giving ‘What is wrong with you?’ energy.” SZA added, “I always thought, ‘Oh my God.’ I’ll never have the approval of anyone in life, this must be my defining factor, this must be the bottom line.”
Doechii has gotten co-signs from successful rappers including Kendrick Lamar and Tyler, The creator, with Tyler reflecting on listening to “Catfish” for the first time. “ I heard that record and I’m like, oh, I’m nothing. I need to get punched in my face so I can do this,” he said.
“When people aren’t familiar with the history of an artist these days, they get suspicious,” she says, referring to allegations that she is an industry plant. “I’m pretty detached emotionally from it because I understand where it’s coming from. And to be honest, once you get any conspiracies around your career, that’s just confirmation that I’m going somewhere and I’m doing something right.”